Addressing School Refusal and Absenteeism through Motivational Interviewing Part 1

This post is the first in a three part series exploring how motivational interviewing can be used to support student absenteeism. In this first article, we introduce the core ideas behind motivational interviewing, including its spirit, process, and key communication skills. In Part 2, we will look at what motivational interviewing might look like in practice through example conversations, along with practical tips and tools educators can use to guide these discussions. In Part 3, we will discuss what to do when students are not ready or able to engage in motivational interviewing conversations.

School Refusal and the Power of Conversation: Using Motivational Interviewing

When students begin refusing school, adults often move quickly into problem solving mode. Meetings are scheduled. Plans are written. Expectations are clarified. Consequences are discussed. Sometimes all of this happens before anyone has really asked the student what is going on.

This response is understandable. School attendance matters, and the longer a student is away the harder it becomes to return. But when conversations move too quickly into persuasion or problem solving, they can unintentionally create resistance. Students may feel pushed, judged, or misunderstood. The result can be a familiar dynamic: adults push harder and students dig in deeper.

Motivational interviewing offers a different approach.

Motivational interviewing, often referred to as MI, is a conversational style designed to help people explore their own motivations for change. Originally developed in the field of addiction treatment, MI is now widely used across health care, counselling, and educational settings. At its core, MI helps people work through ambivalence and move toward actions that align with their own values.

This is particularly relevant for school refusal. Students who avoid school often experience mixed feelings. Part of them may want to avoid school because it feels stressful, overwhelming, or uncomfortable. At the same time, another part of them may know that school is important for their goals, relationships, or future opportunities.

Motivational interviewing helps students explore this tension in a way that supports their autonomy rather than challenges it.

Importantly, motivational interviewing is not counselling. While it can certainly be used within counselling, MI is fundamentally a way of having conversations. Teachers, administrators, counsellors, and support staff can all use elements of motivational interviewing in everyday interactions with students.

The Spirit of Motivational Interviewing

Motivational interviewing is grounded in what practitioners refer to as the “spirit” of MI. This spirit reflects the stance we take when talking with someone about change.

There are four key elements.

1. Partnership means working with the student rather than doing something to them. Instead of positioning ourselves as the expert who will solve the problem, we collaborate with the student to understand what is happening.

2. Acceptance means recognizing and respecting the student’s perspective and autonomy. Students ultimately make their own choices, and MI acknowledges this reality.

3. Compassion means genuinely prioritizing the student’s wellbeing. The goal is not to win an argument about attendance but to support the student in moving toward a healthier and more functional path.

4. Evocation means drawing out the student’s own reasons for change rather than telling them why they should change. In many cases, people are more persuaded by their own words than by advice from others.

   
   

When these elements are present, conversations about school attendance tend to feel very different. Instead of lectures about why school matters, students are invited to think about what matters to them.

The Process of Motivational Interviewing

Motivational interviewing conversations typically move through four general processes.

• The first is engaging. Before discussing attendance or change, the priority is building a working relationship. Students are far more likely to talk honestly when they feel respected and understood.

• The second is focusing. Once a connection is established, the conversation begins to centre on the issue at hand, such as school attendance.

• The third is evoking. This is where MI becomes particularly powerful. Instead of telling students why they should attend school, we invite them to explore their own motivations, concerns, and goals.

• The fourth is planning. When students begin expressing their own reasons for change, the conversation can shift toward practical steps and supports.

These processes are not rigid stages. Conversations often move back and forth between them. The key idea is that motivation for change emerges from the student’s own reflections rather than external pressure.

Another important consideration is matching our response to where the student is at. There is often a tendency to jump quickly into planning and problem solving before we have truly engaged with the student. This “righting reflex” can be difficult for educators and practitioners to resist. However, planning is far more likely to be effective when it comes at the right time, after we have built a connection, clarified the focus, and helped the student begin to articulate their own reasons for change.

The Skills: OARS

Motivational interviewing also relies on a set of practical communication skills often summarized by the acronym OARS.

Open ended questions invite students to share their thoughts and experiences rather than simply answer yes or no questions. For example, instead of asking “Do you want to come to school tomorrow?” a teacher might ask, “What makes school difficult for you right now?”

Affirmations acknowledge the student’s strengths, efforts, and intentions. Even small acknowledgements can help build confidence and trust.

Reflections involve listening carefully and reflecting back what the student is expressing. This shows the student that they are being heard and often encourages them to elaborate further.

Summaries bring together key ideas from the conversation and help students hear their own motivations more clearly.

These skills may sound simple, but when used intentionally they can significantly change the tone of a conversation. Instead of feeling pressured or judged, students feel understood.

A Practical Tool for Schools to Address Absenteeism

Motivational interviewing is not a complete intervention for school refusal, but it can be a powerful tool within a broader support plan. Schools often use strategies such as gradual return plans, academic accommodations, counselling support, and family collaboration. MI can help support these efforts by improving the quality of the conversations that surround them.

For educators who want to try this approach, a simple motivational interviewing worksheet can help guide conversations with students. The worksheet prompts teachers to ask open ended questions, explore what matters to the student, and help them think about manageable next steps.

Sometimes the most powerful intervention is not a program or a policy. It is a conversation that helps a student feel understood and capable of moving forward.

In the context of school refusal, motivational interviewing offers educators a practical way to have those conversations. It shifts the focus from convincing students to attend school toward helping them discover their own reasons for returning.

In Part 2, we will explore what motivational interviewing looks like in real conversations with students. We will also look at a motivational interviewing worksheet and see how it can help guide conversations with students to address absenteeism in schools.

References

Gersib, J. A. (2023). Supporting middle school student behavior change through motivational interviewing. Beyond Behavior, 32(2), 115–127.